The Teacher's Note 請簽名歸還

事情是從一張皺巴巴的爛紙條開始的。

那天兒子一放學回家, 照慣例, 馬上就急著要玩要和妹妹鬥嘴, 總是要三催四請才慢吞吞的把書包裡的東西拿出來歸位 (我準備了in box 讓他自己放從學校帶回來的東西, 我晚上有空時才去翻閱整理)。他放好了一堆拉雜東西後, 從書包裡又拿了張紙出來, 「老師說要你簽名」, 直接交到我手裡就轉頭去玩了。好小子! 開學才不到兩個月, 老師的第一張紙條就來了! 上面罰寫了一遍「我會遵守校規」, 老師請家長簽名歸還, 其他什麼都沒有。重點是, 發生了什麼事呢?

我偷瞄了一下兒子, 完全沒有心虛偽善的樣子。「今天在學校有乖嗎?」「有啊!」看來我得換個方法問,「為什麼老師叫你寫這個句子呢? 你想想看, 是不是有不聽話被老師說了?」兒子這會兒停下來認真想了一下, 「喔, 老師說不可以頭朝下溜滑梯, 很危險。然後叫我坐在旁邊不准玩了。」呼, 還好還好, 小錯, 可以更正。我碎嘴訓誡了 一番, 又解釋了頭朝下溜滑梯可能頭破血流很可怕之類, 就簽了名放回書包的聯絡夾裡, 叮嚀兒子明天一早放進教室老師的in box裡。第二天放學, 兒子一臉悶悶不樂, 委屈的說老師又罰他坐在操場邊不准玩, 因為老師問起昨天媽媽簽名的紙條時, 他一下想不起來放在哪了, 老師就認定他沒帶回去, 馬上再度處罰。其實兒子一早就把聯絡夾交回in box了, 老師完全沒有去看一下。

這樣的懲罰適當嗎? 哪裡有說明若隔天沒有簽名歸還, 孩子就要二度受罰呢? 由一個5歲孩子代替老師跟家長溝通, 這樣合理嗎? 老爺叫我不要太介意, 只是件小事, 才剛開學沒多久, 老師又知道我也是教職人員, 合理的詢問也很容易被誤認為批判 。好吧, 人生本來就不公平, 受點委屈, 讓兒子趁早有個小教訓也好。跟兒子聊了一下已經5歲了, 自己的東西自己要負責云云, 吃了點冰淇淋, 我看他也釋懷得很快。那天晚上我寫了email 告訴老師紙條早已交回, 其他什麼都沒說。

突然想起我還在教書時用的behavior chart。從一開學就和家長和學生說明獎懲辦法, 放在教室前方人人清楚可見的地方, 用不同顏色的色卡來鼓勵良好表現的學生, 也提醒行為需要修正的孩子留意言行, 在上課時不需要為了管理秩序而中斷教學, 也沒有突如其來, 動輒得咎的處罰方式。若當天有特殊的獎懲情況, 放學後我都以簡短紙條或email馬上通知家長。

在兒子的教室裡, 我也見過一模一樣的behavior chart。掛在一堆灰塵僕僕的勞作紙後方, 被圖釘釘著的過期周報半蓋著, 上面仍標示著不知是哪年的學生名字。

是啊, 簽名歸還一張老師的紙條, 不難。但是做一個恰如其分的teacher mom, 很難。

It all started with a piece of wrinkled lined paper back in October.

My little guy pulled a paper out from his backpack and handed it to me, " My teacher said you have to sign this." Then off he went to play with his toys. I opened the folded paper. Ah, here we go, my wormy little guy's first teacher note. It looked like the little guy was asked to write a sentence: " I will follow school rules." And the teacher wanted us to sign and return it.

"Did you have a good day?" I was puzzled about what happened. The little guy paused for a second and said, "Yeah!" Hmm, maybe I should ask in a different way. "Why did your teacher ask you to write this sentence? Did you you get in trouble today?" He stopped playing for a minute and said, "Oh, now I remembered. My teacher said I can't slide head down first on the play structure. It's dangerous."

Whew! Ok, not too bad, it was a minor misbehavior. So I reminded him about playground rules, signed the paper and returned it in his homework folder. The next day, the little guy looked unhappy when I picked him up after school. He didn't have his recess but sat on a bench for a time-out. (If you have kids, you know how important recess is to them!) What was the reason? He said when the teacher asked him about the paper, he forgot where it was. (If you have a 5 years old, you know everything needs to be in plain sight or it's considered gone!) The little guy actually followed my direction and returned the homework folder with the paper in there. He just couldn't remember at that moment. And his teacher didn't bother to check first but sent him straight for another punishment.

Was that a fair consequence? Did the note indicate double punishment if it isn't signed and returned the next day? Is it appropriate to rely on a 5 year old's words to communicate with parents? My big guy told me not to make this into a big deal. Concerns from a teacher mom could easily be mistaken as criticism. Well, I guess life isn't always fair. So I talked the little guy about taking responsibilities. He listened and after a bowl of ice cream, he almost forgot all about losing recess. Later that night, I emailed the teacher and told her the whereabouts of the note, nothing else.

All of a sudden, I thought of the color-coded behavior chart I had in the past teaching years. It was a powerful tool for me to monitor students behavior without interrupting the class. Students could see it in front of the classroom as a visual reminder without being put on the spot. Steps to rewards and different levels of consequences were clearly explained to parents and reinforced with students throughout the year. A quick note or email would follow to communicate with parents about any issues occurred during the school day.

Being a parent volunteer every Thursday, I have seen the same  color-coded chart in my little guy's classroom. It is behind a pile of dusty construction paper, pinned under some old school newsletters, and still labeled with student names from who knows which school year.

I know, it's not hard to just sign and return the teacher's note. But it is very hard not to be a questioning teacher mom.

Volunteer in the Classroom 教室義工初體驗

兒子幼稚園開學已經快滿兩個月了, 十月開始我每週四在他班上當半天的義工媽媽, 小不點的2歲女兒也不得已的紅著眼眶, 背影堅毅的在週四早上去daycare四小時, 對我們三個來說, 都是一個全新的開始和捨得。
 

第一次要去當義工媽媽的前晚, 老爺好意警告我要皮繃緊一點, 克制一下要跳上台教書的衝動,只要幫忙做老師交代的事情就好。嗯, 說得沒錯, 我是為了兒子才去幫忙的, 希望他了解媽媽重視他的學習狀況, 願意參與他學習過程的一部分。於是第一個星期, 我剪了上千張的橘色小紙片, 準備全班30個孩子們要做的南瓜拼貼勞作。第二個星期, 我描畫摺疊了30個火雞帽, 把家庭作業歸檔, 然後在大鐵梯上爬上爬下的更換櫥窗佈置。第三個星期, 由於我是家長會1班1人的美術教學義工, 所以教了一堂30分鐘繪畫音樂兼備的美術課。從頭到尾兒子眼睛睜得大大, 很新奇的看著我口沫橫飛, 其他的孩子們倒是聽得津津有味。

 

說真的, 我是有點想念教書的日子。兒子是迫不及待的希望每週四都快點到, 女兒是一聽到媽媽要volunteer就委屈紅眼, 撒嬌說要一起去哥哥學校。

 

啊, 這學年還有好多個星期四呢! 到下個學年之前, 我還剩多少天能再想想何時回去重執教鞭呢?!

 

 

 

My little guy has started kindergarten for two months now. I've decided to volunteer in his class on Thursdays. And my 2 years old little girl has to go to daycare for 4 hours on Thursday mornings. Overall, it's a whole new experience for the three of us!

My big guy warned me before the first time I started volunteering: You need to control the urge of taking the class over and just do whatever the teacher asks. Yes, I totally agree. I'm there for the little guy so that he knows how much I care about his learning.

The first week, I chopped close to a thousand tiny pieces of orange paper for a pumpkin mosaic project. The second week, I traced 30 turkey hats, filed homework, climbed a ladder and took down window decorations. The third week, I finally got to teach an art lesson since I signed up to be a PTA art docent. I have to admit, the teacher in me is itching. Volunteering has gotten me back into a real classroom. However, the experience has been quite interesting to me with mixed feelings.

The little guy is definitely loving the idea of me being there - even though most of the time I sat behind the chart stand and buried by piles of paper. When I was teaching the mini art lesson last Thursday, his eyes got wide open while his classmates participated with excitement. I guess it was an eye opening experience for him - seeing Mommy in action as a classroom teacher for 30 minutes.

There are more Thursdays to come. And I look forward to being there, seeing my little guy learn.

There are more school years to come. And I start to wonder when (or ever) I should be back on stage as a teacher.

 

 

First Day of School 第一天上學

While we were still getting over jet-lag from our Taiwan trip, my little guy's first day of kindergarten was around the corner already. As usual, I got stressed out about this than I really needed to be. What kind of teacher will he have? Is she caring and patient? Is she organized and knowledgeable? Will my little guy make friends and learn happily? Lots for me to wonder and the answers remain unknown until much later.

As I expected, my little guy was quite nervous the day before. We took him to the school yard for a tour in the afternoon. Before bedtime, we read the story "The Kissing Hand" together to give him some encouragement. Daddy even had a "boys' talk" with him - if you would like to become a police officer when you grow up, you have to go to school and be smarter than the bad guys.

However, my little guy still cried a little bit about wanting to stay home with me and his little sister. I know it always takes a couple of days for him to get used to changes. During the past month in Taipei, it took him quite some time to adjust to the different lifestyle and the art class I signed him up for. But he would be a happy camper as soon as he got familiar with the routines.

September 5, 2012, first day of school, maybe Daddy's police story sank in. My little guy was happy and ready for kindergarten in the morning. He said hi to the teacher and started playing basketball on the playground right away. I watched him outside of the fence with my little girl until he lined up, waved goodbye, and went in the class with the other kids.

Yeah, I made it without crying. As I was walking back to my graciously fought and earned parking space, my heart was filled up with joy. The journey of public education has officially started for my little guy.

  

Kindergarten Inventory Test 幼稚園學前考試

自從二月時我們家兒子抽籤抽中，可以去上家裡附近隸屬的公立小學以後(僧多粥少所以要抽籤)，我就如釋重負的把這件事擱在一旁，繼續過我的家庭主婦安逸日子。直到最近逛街時發現，成群的小鬼頭大白天的就在公共場所亂竄，我才驚覺暑假已經開始了。

咳咳, 這就意味著小學行政人員即將要開始精神鬆懈，於是我神經緊張的決定，最好還是趁早再打通電話去，確認一下沒啥別的事要做，兒子九月可以穩穩當當的開心上學去。

沒想到學校辦公人員放輕鬆的速度比我快，我從早上9點打到下午2點都沒人接。下午3點，總算有人接了電話，1分鐘內將我迅速打發，說一切都沒問題就等開學，在掛我電話之前落下一句「喔，八月份要考一個幼稚園學前考試，之後學校會再通知。」

什麼？我沒聽錯吧！「嗯，請問一下，這是什麼樣的考試？考試的用意是什麼呢?」「考試的結果要用來決定學生的班別，其他的我不清楚，請等學校通知。」就這樣，問不出個所以然來，我只好掛了電話。

一星期之後，學校通知來了，看完了還是一頭霧水。信裡不但沒有告知家長考試的內容，也沒有說明要給五歲小孩考試的用意，只說這是為了讓老師能準備更充分，讓小孩學習會更好，而且還用大寫字母強調學校很忙，請在被指定的時間報到不要囉嗦。

從家長的角度來看，我是一肚子疑問。這是國家的義務教育，連非法移民都可以讀的公立小學，不是私立名校，要大把鈔票，能力測驗，還要通過面試才能就讀。就算要測驗學生的程度，用來幫助老師因材施教，學校卻用這單一考試的成績做學前分班，對求學之路剛開始的5歲孩子來說，公平嗎？以做老師的角度來看，我也曾經在教幼稚園那年做過類似的評量，但那是在已經開學2-3星期之後，我對每個學生都有了相當程度的認識和了解，評量的結果也僅供我個人的教學參考，與學校行政作業或班級分發是完全無關的。

考慮了一下，孩子的爸和我決定冷處理，反正八月回台灣的機票早就訂好了，勢必是沒辦法按時去考試，開心度假回來再看著辦吧！

這年頭，要讓兒子上個學可真不容易啊!

After my son's name had been picked in the kindergarten lottery in February, I felt at ease that he can start school in September with no problems. However, knowing summer break has just started and school office will be closed shortly after,  I got nervous again and decided I should call to make sure there is nothing else we need to do.

I was expecting the school office to answer the phone promptly since all kids are out. Instead, I called every hour from 9am-2pm but no one answered. Finally, someone picked up the phone at 3pm. The office staff on the phone said everything was all set and my son is good to go. Before I could say thank you and hang up the phone, she said, " Oh, he will need to take a test sometime in August before school starts. So we can determine whether he will be in the early or the late bird kindergarten class." (Early bird class is 8:30-11:50 am, late bird class is 9:30 am-12:50 pm, the same teacher teaches the two staggered classes.)

Wait a minute, I thought. "Can you please tell me what the test is about and when it will happen in August? " "No, I don't know. You will just have to wait for a letter from school. It will be mailed to you next week." I said thank you and hung up the phone. I knew I wouldn't get any more information from her.

This week, the mysterious letter has arrived.

I read it from a parent's perspective. The letter provides no information about the test. And it demands you to keep your appointment time because they are very busy. This is a public school, not a private school which children need to test and interview to get in. Even if an assessment needs to be done before school starts, should the result be used to determin which kindergarten class my son will be in? Does this mean the early bird class is full of immature dummies? Does this mean late bird class is full of beyond the grade level geniuses? Should we label 5 years old children based on a single test, which the content is unknown and unavailable to the parents?

Putting all the questions aside, I read it again with a teacher's mind. My first year as a teacher was to teach a kindergarten class. From what I remember, I think this is the inventory test which evaluate a new kindergartener's academic abilities.  The assessment is usually done during the first two weeks "after" a new school year has begun. It helps the teacher get an overview of the students' academic levels so the lessons can be planned accordingly. However, I never heard of this inventory test being administered "before" the kindergarten year starts, nor did the result being used to determine class assignments.

Well, the big guy and I have decided to look at it this way: since we have already booked tickets to visit family in Taiwan for the whole month of August, we will not be able to make it on the assigned appointment date anyways. We will enjoy our vacation and worry about the test later.

Isn't it easy to get my son into a public school kindergarten!


(For more information about kindergarden in California, visit http://www.cde.ca.gov/ci/gs/em/kinderinfo.asp )

Kindergarten Lottery 開獎日

We planned for a sledding trip at Lake Tahoe for my big guy's birthday. We didn't know at the time that the day we plan to leave, was going to be the day of my son's kindergarten lottery drawing.

According to the district website, the kindergarten lottery would be held by the principal and a PTA member at Pupil Service. The result would be available on Feb. 3 at the participating school sites. (Doesn't it sound like a restaurant commercial? "special prizes available only at participating locations" ) Therefore, on Feb. 3, after I finished packing three people's luggages for the weekend trip (The big guy is on his own.), I called the school to check on the result.

"The result will be posted after 5 pm today on the school library window." said the office lady who answered the phone. "Oh I'm sorry to bother you. It's about 3 pm now and we are going out of town for the weekend to celebrate a birthday. Is there anyway you can help to look up my son's name? Knowing the result before we leave will be a great relief for us."  "No." said the office lady over the phone, short and firm. "Oh ok, is the list going to be posted online so we can check after 5 pm today?" "No." the office lady repeated again, "The result will be posted after 5 pm today on the school library window."

Well, I said thank you and hung up and phone. Obviously the kindergarten lottery can't be compared to the California Lottery system. The result is not available online. And I totally understand the school policy of treating every parent the same way, no exceptions. So we put the unknown aside and enjoyed our trip for the weekend.

On our way back on Sunday, we drove by the school and there it was. My son's initials and birth date on the "attending" list on the library window. I hoorayed and clapped back to the car. My little daughter who had no idea what happened laughed along. My son looked surprised and told me if I don't settle down quickly, I will get a time-out when we go home.

So, yeah, we won the kindergarten lottery. I couldn't help but glancing at the names on the "waiting" list, all 54 of them. What are their parents thinking about right now? What does it mean to be on a waiting list to a high API score school? I'm sure their parents have done all the right things at the right time. But I guess in the end, it's all about just having some luck.

So for those of you out there waiting to participate in the kindergarten registration, here are some of tips to get you through:  幼兒園新生入學註冊須知

1. Right around the December holidays, check on the local school district website for kindergarten registration dates and information. 十二月起就可以上當地學區網站查詢幼兒園新生註冊資訊和截止日期。

2. Get the registration packet and prepare all documents. Be ridiculouly nice to the school staff. And triple check you have everything before you turn it in. 盡快到學校領取註冊資料並備齊所有文件。交件前重複檢查確認，對學校工作人員客氣有禮是不會錯的。

3. If there is a kindergarten lottery involved, it means your child might not get into the high API score school you move your family close to. There is nothing you can do at this time, so just chill. 如果新生人數過多，則需要抽籤才能決定入學，沒抽中去另一個學校還是有書讀，放寬心等結果吧!

And remember, no matter what the result is, which school your child gets in, how far you have to drive, or how much you dislike the teachers, the chances are, your child will still learn, make friends, and have fun wherever he/she goes.

Kindergarten Registration 註冊中

I don't know if you have seen the Target 2010 holiday commercial. It was so hilarious and made me want to rush to Target right away. Even though I'm almost there everyday already...buying essential and unnecessary household items at the same time.

As much as I can remember, the blonde lady in the commercial was wearing full body red track suit, doing sit-ups on the big red Target ball, (my 20 months old daughter still thinks it can be kicked like a regular ball...), lifting baskets of products as weights, practicing speed-giftwrap, running with a parachute behind, and counting down days on the calendar...all for the 2 days sale starting on black Friday.

As hilarious (or ridiculous) as it might sound, I did exactly all the above things in my mind, over and over again. But it was not for the great Target sale. It was for my son's kindergarten registration.

Yes, you read me right. Now you know what kind of mom I am...a teacher mom to be exact. After being an elementary teacher for 6 years in a prestigious south bay community, I decided to take one year leave to spend more time with my own little ones. Before I could even catch my breath, my husband got a job offer too good to reject. So here we are, moving from the sunny L.A. to the cloudy northern Cal. The dream of having my kids going to the same school I teach at can't seem to come true anymore.

Learning to be a full time mom is quite a lesson for me. All of a sudden, my son is turning 5 and entering kindergarten this fall. You must think when it comes to school registration, I shouldn't be sweating at all. I should have more insights than most parents. Unfortunately, that's why I am sweating. Because I know how tideous the paper work can be. I know how unclear the deadlines are listed. I know the possibility of one little thing goes undone, my son might not be in the lottery drawing in time.

Yes, you read me right again, lottery drawing, for a kindergarten spot in a public school setting. It's not happening at every elementary school site though, only at the "good" ones. (Oh, next time I'll talk about how "good" a school can be by just looking at its API scores...) Siblings of current students get priority to enroll in kindergarten first. Then the rest available spots are for first-born kids, which means new students to the district. However, at a "good" school, there are always way more new enrollments than the spots provided. Parents buy the unreasonable high-priced house in hope to get their kids into the good neighborhood school. But the truth is, after you have done the registration right, if your childn't name isn't picked at the lottery drawing, he or she will still be overflown to a school which still have spots available. (a.k.a, a "bad" neighborhood where parents won't fight to live in).

Now, can you understand my whole mental process of the Target preparation? I got the kindergarten registration packet in time, filled out all the forms, got the oral assessment form signed by a licensed dentist, dug out all legal documents proving residency, then booked the first appointment at 8 am to turn in the whole packet. The night before the registration appointment, I had my husband double checked all forms, told my children that Daddy will give them breakfast next morning, and went to bed thinking everything was fine and ready.

Finally, the big time had arrived. Within one minute of flipping through my son's kindergarten registration packet, the lady holding a grande cup of Starbucks coffee said to me, "I'm sorry, I can't take your registration packet today." I kept my smile but raised my voice a bit, "Excuse me, what do you mean?" "Here, you are missing an utility bill, without the bill, I can't take your packet today." "But I brought my car insurance bill. On the information sheet, it indicates that the car insurance bill is one of the documents which can prove my current location of residency."

After checking with three other ladies for 10 minutes and reading the information sheet for another minute, the lady returned to the table and said, "Oh ok,  it must be new this year. You are done. Good luck. Hopefully we'll get to see you again in fall."

There it was. My son's kindergarten registration was done. It felt like I had shopped until I dropped at Target's black Friday sale. Everything on my list was in my basket already. And I didn't even need to pepper-spray anybody!

The result is out of my hands now. All we need is a little good luck. I can't help but worry - what if they lose the 3 by 5 index card with my son's name on it? He won't even be in the lottery drawing!!!