Between Rewards and Consequences 獎懲之間的溫柔

我不知道其他已經為人父母的朋友們有沒有事先被警告過, 但是從來沒人在我生兩個小孩前先提醒我, 當媽媽是個沒日沒夜, 一秒鐘也沒得請假的工作。更麻煩的昰, 怎麼當個你自己孩子的好媽媽根本沒個準兒。不像是想吃雞塊就去麥當勞, 想看1元電影就去租RedBox, 或是看到鬼祟的人就叫條子來這麼簡單。沒有什麼秘笈或先知, 能在你不知道怎麼辦時馬上研判當時的狀況, 提供你精闢的說明和詳細解套模式。

所以當媽媽不知道該怎麼教養小孩時, 要問誰? 所有有小孩的人都會心有戚戚焉的聽你抱怨, 沒小孩的人也可以熱血沸騰發表養寵物的經驗, 要是問到個老師或是教練, 說起獎懲孩子總好像是個權威。但我總覺得,不管別人的方法多好, 建議多誠懇, 自己的孩子該怎麼教, 好像還是得自己斟酌看著辦。

我四歲半的兒子打小就是個開心友善的寶貝, 1歲半坐在推車裡就猛跟陌生人傻笑揮手。開始學說話後觀察力超強, 記得媽媽怎麼開車才是回家的路。三歲開始上學後好喜歡老師和同學, 周末還沮喪的問為什麼學校不開門。4歲左右愛耍寶, 更愛上老卡通"Tom&Jerry", 去公園五分鐘內跟其他陌生小孩變很熟打成一片。但是多話熱忱的一體兩面, 就是愛管閒事, 碎嘴, 和缺乏自我控制。常常在上課時急著要聊天, 午餐時忙著搞笑忘了吃飯, 跆拳道練習時在關心新同學, 顧不了要站直排隊。最後結果就是一天到晚被帶離現場, 到旁邊去冷靜。在老師和教練多次失去耐性後, 兒子在其他同學和家長前有心無意的被貼了標籤。

每個小男孩都有這樣的過渡期嗎? 我想每個孩子都有些獨一無二的狀況。我承認兒子常常在測試我的耐心極限, 使盡所有以前用來教學生的把戲之後, 我還是沒有建立任何老師的威嚴, 在兒子眼裡, 我就只是媽媽而已。昨天又為了在跆拳道愛說話發了他一頓脾氣, 忽然在鏡子裡看見我皺眉咆嘯的臉孔, 很猙獰。

不管今後兒子表現如何, 我還是會一直學習怎麼做個更好的媽媽。我還是會蹲下用他的高度聽他說話, 真心接受他的反省。我還是會抱著他在睡前說個故事, 讓他知道媽媽愛他, 在媽媽心裡他永遠是個寶貝。

教養孩子的路還很長很長, 希望我時時提醒自己, 不要忘記在獎懲之間, 一顆做母親溫柔的心。

For all the parents out there, did anyone tell you raising a child is a lesson you need to constantly work on every second of the day? No one ever told me that before I brought two lives into this world. And the scary part is, there isn't a specific authority go-to figure who can always give you the right answers when you don't know what to do. It's not like you want chicken nuggets, you go straight to McDonalds. You want a $1 movie, you find a RedBox. You see suspicious activities, you call the cops.

Therefore, anyone who has kids can be the professional in parenting. Anyone who doesn't have kids can be also be a parenting expert providing a different perspective. Not to mention teachers, conselors, and coaches, their insights on how to praise and discipline kids are highly valued as well. But the truth is, no matter what the other parenting gurus say, when it comes to your own child, you should be the one making the best judgement and decisions.

My 4 and half years old son is a very happy, observant, friendly and expressive boy. When he was 18 months old, he would smile and wave at strangers when I pushed him in the stroller. When he started talking, he recognized the streets in our neighborhood and Grandma's house.  When he started preschool at 3, he couldn't wait to tell me his day. And he asked to go to school during the weekends. When he was 4, he enjoyed "Tom& Jerry" so much and would make friends with any random child in the park within 5 minutes.

However, from a different perspective, my sweet boy, is also very whiny, nosy, chatty and lack of internal self-control. At preschool, he tries to chat with his buddies during instructional time. At school lunch, he tries to be funny and couldn't finish his food.  At Taekwondo practice, he wants to know the new kid's name and can't stand in a straight line. So it turns out, he gets time-outs a lot. And sometimes, unintentionally but inappropriately, gets singled out by teachers and coaches in front of other children and parents.

Are all boys his age like this? I don't know. Every child is unique in his/her own way. But I do know at times, my son is pushing my level of patience. Yesterday, I saw how ugly my face was in the mirror when I yelled at him. After trying all my teacher strategies, (plus the Chinese parenting books saying "not" to reward or threaten your child), I failed to establish my teacher authority to my son. After all, I'm just his mommy. In the mean while, he continues to be who he is - happy, observant, friendly and expressive on one day; whiny, nosy, chatty and lack of self-control on another.

I realized no matter how my son did at school or at Taekwondo, how he got lectured or time-outs by teachers, coaches or even us, at the end of the day, he is still just my little boy. I would still kneel down to his height, listen to what happened to his day and how he promised to do better. I would still read him a bedtime story and give him a long hug, tell him I love him very much and how special he is in my heart.

Between all the rewards and consequences, please don't let me forget the tenderness in a mother's heart.

Book Review: 團圓 / Immigrants

和好姊妹在台北逛花栗鼠兒童書店時發現了這本童書 -  團圓，嚴實的用塑料薄膜包裹著，一本正經的被放在書架上，好像深怕別人偷看了裡面的故事。我被書名和封面吸引，儘管看不到故事的內容，我還是買下了帶回來準備講給兒子聽。湊合著床前的昏黃小燈，這ㄧ講可不得了，哭點很低的我淚水直打轉，眨著眼睛聲音還差點哽咽。

兒子還小，不懂鄉愁，不懂離別，更不懂團圓之後的離別。

故事裡小女孩的爸爸在外地蓋房子， 一年只能回家一次，就是過年的時候。從一開始見面對爸爸有些陌生，到和爸爸一起包硬幣在湯圓裡，穿新衣拜新年，幫忙爸爸整修房子，看舞龍舞獅，堆雪人，小女孩和爸爸開心的相聚，時間卻過得很快，爸爸又要收拾行李出遠門了。

在中國，每年有無數的移民工人從農村到城市尋找工作，因為政府的戶籍制度，他們無法在落腳城市取得居民合法身分，沒有身分則不能享有城市居民的教育和醫療福利。大多數的移民工人住在雇主搭建的宿舍裡，賺取微薄的薪水，幾乎與外界隔絕，有家眷的只能每年過年時見一次面。

12 年了，我這個美國第一代移民掙得了自己一塊小小的位置，也試著每年回家一次。什麼時候，在中國境內的移民人口也能篳路藍縷，城鄉相融?

I came across this children's picture book written in Mandarin while I was hanging out at a children's bookstore in Taipei. It was all wrapped in platic and I couldn't see what the story was about at all. However, I love the book title - Tuan Yuan (It means "reunion" in Mandarin.) and the illustration on the book cover. So I brought it back home and read it to my son as a bed time story. It turned out, my tears unexpectedly ran like a broken faucet.

The little girl's father comes home only once a year for a couple of days. He builds houses in other cities in China and he just came home for the Chinese New Year. Through putting a coin in sticky rice balls, visiting friends, doing maintenance work on the house and watching dragon dance together, the little girl enjoyed the short period of time she had with her father, until it's time to say goodbye again.

Millions of "immigrant labors" in China moved from farm villages to cities, looking for jobs to feed their family. Despite the extended period of time they stay in the cities, the government considers them as temporary city residents. These "immigrant labors" don't share the same benefits in health insurance and medical care as the existing city residents. They live in dorms specifically built for them by their employers. Working long hours and making minimum wages, most of them don't have much contact with the actual city life. Moreover, since their children don't have the equal rights to attend the city public schools, their family usually stayed behind in the farm villages. Sadly, many children in the farm villages only get to see their father (sometimes both parents) once a year.

Being one of the countless first generation immigrants to the United States, my reunion with my extended family also happens once in a year. Although I made close to minimum wages as a former public school teacher, I had access to affordable health insurance and managed to purchase a suburban house. My children will benefit from free public education unil 12th grade wherever we choose to live.

In a way, I am grateful of this land of equal opportunities. While Jeremy Lin continues to prove "Linsanity" is not "Linished", I guess I have proved a FOB can become a credential teacher, too - and a pretty darn good one.

Home 回家

On October 27, 1999, I carried two heavy luggage cases and moved from Taipei to Torrance, California. I left my family, friends, and everything I was familiar with behind for an unknown new beginning. At that time, I didn't know I would call myself a Californian one day. Nor did I know I would start my own family here.

Ever since we moved to Fremont 7 months ago, I gradually found how much I miss Torrance, the school I taught at, and even the Pacific Ocean. There is nothing wrong with Fremont, especially with all the Chinese restaurants and stores a full time mommy can hope for. There is nothing wrong with the house we are renting either, other than the occasionally stucked garage door. However, every once in a while, I still complained that I want to go back to Torrance, almost as often as how I nagged about moving back to Taipei years ago.

I couldn't help but thinking: How do you call a place "home"?

When I was little, my parents moved us from one renting place to another due to a variety of reasons. I didn't feel much (or had any choices) at the time. Until I moved out of the little island, I start to envy people who always have a place to go back to in Taiwan. It could be just a tiny old apartment. The bedroom probably hasn't changed much since high school. But that's yours. That's where you grew up. That's where all the memories were.

In August 2007, my son was three months old. We bought our first house in Torrance. I remembered looking at it as the painters painting all the wall colors I picked. I thought, " This is where my home is going to be. The memories with my big guy and my little one will start here from now on. "

Who knows less than four years, we had to rent our house out and moved to Fremont for another new beginning. My baby daughter is too young to remember anything. But my big guy definitely misses his childhood friends and family. From our trip back to Torrance last month, I saw how hard it was for my 4 years old son to say goodbye to his friends and grandparents.

My big guy said, " Home is wherever you and the kids are now."

I feel the same way, too. But somehow, "home" means more to me than just being with my big guy and little ones. It's a place where I can plant my root in. It's a place where I can comfortably fit in and belong to. It's a place with people I love and people who love me. So, my home is in Taipei. It is in Torrance. And who knows?  Maybe it's even in Fremont.

One day, I hope with our love and guidance, my little ones will find their way home simple, direct, and without doubts, too.

Book Review: Llama Llama Red Pajama 拉瑪故事系列

Baby Llamma was tugged in bed and Mama Llama turned the lights off. Was Baby Llama asleep yet? Not yet! Baby Llama wanted a drink. But Mama was busy washing dishes and talking on the phone. Baby Llama went from whimpering to hollering. Llama drama was not going to stop until Mama Llama came to set things straight!

I found this heart-warming llama book on the catalog when my students were placing their orders from Scholastics every month. It is a cute story to help young chlildren face bedtime fear. I read this book to my son when he was 2 years old, getting ready to switch from crib to the big boy bed. He loved this story and asked for a cup of water before bed ever since...But I was surprised how he grew to love his new bed and sleep independently in such a short time!

Another llama book I found was at our school book fair. Mama Llama gets Llama Llama ready for his first day of preschool. Say hi to the teacher. Look at the toys. Everything was new and everyone was new. It was too much for Llama Llama when Mama Llama had to leave! Is Mama Llama ever going to come back? Of course! And the other children showed Llama Llama how fun a school day can be!

This is a great book to prepare little ones for the first day of school. The rhyming story is fun to read and there are many colorful characters in the illustration to catch the young reader's eye. It eases children's  mind about the uncertainty of a new school and encourages them to talk about their feelings.

The third Llama book tells a story which probably every parent has experienced! Have you even seen little ones throwing tantrums at a store? Screaming, crying, throwing things, lying on the ground, dragging Mommy's pants, begging for what they want...Yes, it's the kind of public embarrassment only parents will understand and pity!

Llama Llama doesn't like to shop with Mama Llama. But shopping needs to be done and Mama Llama can't leave Llama at home alone. Lots of aisles, busy shoppers, and long lines at Shop-O-Rama, before Mama Llama could notice, Llama Llama was getting very MAD! Mama Llama quickly calmed him down and cleaned everything up. Now Mama Llama will make shopping more fun for Llama Llama.

Enjoy this book with your young ones! You can also alk about how to make shopping easier and more fun for the both of you!

我實在太喜歡這三本llama的書了! 為了llama 的中文譯名，我還意外在網上資料裡學到了「美洲駝 llama」，「駱馬vicuna」和「羊駝/草泥馬 Alpaca」的分別呢!!

找了好一會兒才找到中英雙語版本的拉瑪故事系列，剛好是我有的那三本故事集合成一套販售。由封面圖片看來是由內地出版社做的翻譯(簡體字)，把llama音譯為拉瑪，保留了英語原著裡押韻的趣味，所以我也跟著用了!  雙語版本在英文原著的部分標示了漢語拼音，更方便以中文為母語的孩子們閱讀。原著在美國很受歡迎喔! 一些周邊商品也開始熱賣了! 下面這是我找到中英雙語版的Amazon網站連結，有興趣可以參考一下，不知道在台灣的書店或網上買不買的到!

Mandarin bilingual version of the books:

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/7539037059/sr=1-1/qid=1329255109/ref=olp_product_details?ie=UTF8&me=&qid=1329255109&sr=1-1&seller=

Harvard to Knicks - Who is Jeremy Lin? 誰是林書豪

Like I mentioned before, I was born and raised in Taiwan, moved to the States in 1999. Even though it has been over 10 years, I'm still pretty much a FOB. And I'm the same as the majority of Asian girls in my generation who live in Asia forever - we don't really care for sports. Not basketball, not baseball, not soccer, not sporty anything. (I know, there are some of you out there who can prove me wrong, like my dear friend Maria, but I said "majority" of my generation, ok? )

I don't know why. Maybe it's because I never had the genes to run fast, jump high, or handle any kind of ball in the right way. My friends were shocked when they knew P.E. is one of the subject I had to teach as an elementary school teacher. I don't blame them. My mom signed me up for swimming lessons in middle school but until this day I'm still afraid of water. Out of 56 girls in my high school class, I came in last running 100 meters. My eyes and arms don't coordinate well to hit the tennis ball with the racket. I tripped on tiny rocks when I walk in the park with my 21 month old daughter. Anyways, you get the picture. You will not find me as the tanned bikini Asian chick playing beach volley anywhere.

But ever since this Monday, I started paying attention to the NBA games, all because of Jeremy Lin. I had no idea who he was. I guess no one did. He came out of nowhere and became the point guard, the center of attention of New York Knicks.

He is not like Yao Ming, the 7ft. 6 in. giant who was a professional basketball player from China . Jeremy Lin was born in the States and grew up in Palo Alto, California. His parents immigrated from Taiwan in the 70's. His father taught his brothers and him how to play basketball at the Y. After receiving no athletic scholarships, Jeremy went to Harvard and graduated with a 3.3 GPA, major in economics and minor in sociology. Sounds like a typically Chinese American kid, doesn't it? But the brainy young man surprised the world with 28 points as Knicks beat Utah Jazz on Feb. 6.

People in Taiwan have already called him the "Taiwanese Pride". What does Jeremy Lin represent to the Chinese Americans, or the Asian Americans in the States? Is he slashing the stereotype that nerdy Asians only belong to the golf courses?

All I know is, Jeremy Lin has got my big guy fired up, waiting to watch the Lakers V.S. Knicks game tonight. A Chinese American boy growing up in Cali can actually play (and play well so far) in the NBA! After a whole week of "Jeremy Lin 101" with me, my 5ft. 8in. big guy is suddently 23 years old again, and definitely not that much shorter than Jeremy's 6ft. 3 in.......

Oh, the American dream! Look at Jeremy Lin! I wonder how many people have done the right things to nurture such an outstanding young man. As a Chinese American teacher and mommy, what role can I play in my young children's life?

Book Review: The Kissing Hand 魔法親親



This lovely book was intruduced to me by another teacher at my school when I was a first year kindergarten teacher.

It is a heart-warming story talking about a little raccoon Chester who is ready to start school. He has all kinds of doubts and fears, just like any primary aged children before their first day of school. Chester's mom came up with a great idea to help him feel loved and secured by giving him a kiss in the hand. Whenever Chester feels lonely or scared, he can just hold up his hand to his face, the he will feel mommy's love even when she is not around.

I read this book to my son when he was 3, right before he started prescool.  We both loved this story and read it several times together. The little guy even noticed from the illustration that Chester is going to school at night and his teacher is an owl. It has been almost two years since we first read the story. But we still do the kissing hand every night before he goes to bed!

Hope you'll find this book and enjoy it as much as we do!

中文版是由上誼出版，書名是魔法親親，翻譯的很溫馨也很貼切。小浣熊Chester在故事裡表達了對第一次上學的不安，還有從家裡轉換到學校環境的焦慮，浣熊媽媽用一個在掌心的親親安撫了孩子的心，讓小浣熊Chester在媽媽不在身邊時，也能感受到媽媽的愛和溫暖。

Kindergarten Lottery 開獎日

We planned for a sledding trip at Lake Tahoe for my big guy's birthday. We didn't know at the time that the day we plan to leave, was going to be the day of my son's kindergarten lottery drawing.

According to the district website, the kindergarten lottery would be held by the principal and a PTA member at Pupil Service. The result would be available on Feb. 3 at the participating school sites. (Doesn't it sound like a restaurant commercial? "special prizes available only at participating locations" ) Therefore, on Feb. 3, after I finished packing three people's luggages for the weekend trip (The big guy is on his own.), I called the school to check on the result.

"The result will be posted after 5 pm today on the school library window." said the office lady who answered the phone. "Oh I'm sorry to bother you. It's about 3 pm now and we are going out of town for the weekend to celebrate a birthday. Is there anyway you can help to look up my son's name? Knowing the result before we leave will be a great relief for us."  "No." said the office lady over the phone, short and firm. "Oh ok, is the list going to be posted online so we can check after 5 pm today?" "No." the office lady repeated again, "The result will be posted after 5 pm today on the school library window."

Well, I said thank you and hung up and phone. Obviously the kindergarten lottery can't be compared to the California Lottery system. The result is not available online. And I totally understand the school policy of treating every parent the same way, no exceptions. So we put the unknown aside and enjoyed our trip for the weekend.

On our way back on Sunday, we drove by the school and there it was. My son's initials and birth date on the "attending" list on the library window. I hoorayed and clapped back to the car. My little daughter who had no idea what happened laughed along. My son looked surprised and told me if I don't settle down quickly, I will get a time-out when we go home.

So, yeah, we won the kindergarten lottery. I couldn't help but glancing at the names on the "waiting" list, all 54 of them. What are their parents thinking about right now? What does it mean to be on a waiting list to a high API score school? I'm sure their parents have done all the right things at the right time. But I guess in the end, it's all about just having some luck.

So for those of you out there waiting to participate in the kindergarten registration, here are some of tips to get you through:  幼兒園新生入學註冊須知

1. Right around the December holidays, check on the local school district website for kindergarten registration dates and information. 十二月起就可以上當地學區網站查詢幼兒園新生註冊資訊和截止日期。

2. Get the registration packet and prepare all documents. Be ridiculouly nice to the school staff. And triple check you have everything before you turn it in. 盡快到學校領取註冊資料並備齊所有文件。交件前重複檢查確認，對學校工作人員客氣有禮是不會錯的。

3. If there is a kindergarten lottery involved, it means your child might not get into the high API score school you move your family close to. There is nothing you can do at this time, so just chill. 如果新生人數過多，則需要抽籤才能決定入學，沒抽中去另一個學校還是有書讀，放寬心等結果吧!

And remember, no matter what the result is, which school your child gets in, how far you have to drive, or how much you dislike the teachers, the chances are, your child will still learn, make friends, and have fun wherever he/she goes.

Gifts Gifts Gifts!

The holidays were long gone and now the Chinese New Year is almost over. But I still didn't get a chance to put away our tree and the assorted shiny ornaments. Since the tree is still standing there, I kept the lights plugged in every evening. I guess to a certain point, enough blinking is enough. My son has already asked me twice with a puzzled face, " Is Christmas coming again, Mommy?"

Okay, call me lazy. But it's not exactly an easy job. Plus I'm still receovering from all the gift sorting and unwrapping. After the "oohs!" and "aahs!" and "???", thinking about what to re-gift and where to store the rest took most of my energy already. (Re-gifting? Please, let's be honest here. Who doesn't do it? I even have a re-gifting storage box in my garage.)

Don't get me wrong. I fully enjoyed the holiday gatherings and gift exchange. Cooking, eating, and hanging out with people are some my favorite things to do. And from the bottom of my heart, I appreciate the thoughts and wishes embedded in the gifts that everyone had chosen for us. But, there is always something of no use. Or I simply can't bring myself to use. A brass candle holder with three white candles for a Chinese family? A box of soap shaped as frosted cupcakes for two little children? I mean, I'd love to have some romantic moments with my big guy and see my kids bathed clean. However, it's rather difficult not to think of a tomb, or tell my little ones these cupcakes are for cleaning.

Back in 2005, it was my first year teaching in the U.S. public school as an kindergarten teacher. My school is in a small prestigious community in the south bay area with over 98% caucasian population. The school is located right by the cliff, with the grand view of the Pacific ocean, embraced by the sea breeze and the sound of contant crashing waves.  And I, the new young Asian teacher, who speaks English with a Mandarin accent, was surrounded by experienced teachers and parents worth millions of dollars. When it was around the holiday time, my colleagues began to receive gift cards from Nordstrom and the little blue box from Tiffany. I couldn't recall what I had as tokens of appreciation from parents that year. However, I remember the first stack of cards my students made for me.

30 cards, each with a Chirstmas trees drawn in crayon red and green, decorated with glued glitter dots, 29 "Merry Christmas to Ms. Hsieh!" written by little hands. Kento, the 5 years old long hair boy, who just moved from Tokyo to U.S. for three months at the time, wrote me this message: "Happy Christmas!  I like you in America."

Ever since then, I have taught 6 more years at different grade levels, received many student-made cards and generous gift cards. Somehow, Kento's tree and words stayed with me. The genuin wish and what I meant in a young heart, it is something of no apparent use. But it is definitely something I will never regift.

Monday Night Dinner

I just came back from my hometown Taiwan earlier this month. The never-long-enough vacation was filled by eating two breakfast daily (which include a stuffed rice ball with soy milk first, and a sandwich with barley milk later), chatting with family, lunch with stay-at-home moms, roaming the streets, random snack from street vendors, reading at Eslite bookstore, dinner with friends who work WAY too hard, shopping at night markets, random dessert from street vendors, and the fabulousness of being alone. Oh, I almost forgot. There was also, a bottle or two, of the Taiwanese Golden Label Beer in between the ongoing eating.

(Note: Teachers and Moms are human, too, especially a teacher mom. I do drink, appropriately and occasionally.)

How did I get to do all that being a mom of two little kids? Good question. I didn't take them with me! Yes, I can see some of you out there rolling your eyes at me. How could you!? Well, my big guy said ok and my in-laws took over the job of being the cook, the cleaner, the driver, and the nanny. Thanks to them, I got to be just me for two weeks.

If you are like me, moving to a foreign country at a young adult age, you miss the food you grow up with. I sure can find all sorts of Chinese cuisine here in Cali. But the food just doesn't taste right. Adding the long drive to the restaurant and the lack of variety on the menu, orange chicken and beef broccoli just don't sound very appetizing at any time. In Taipei, three meals and two snacks a day, I never had the chance to eat the same thing twice. The fact that I don't dare to drive in Taipei didn't stop me from eating. Any street vendors and restaurants are accessible with the MRT system or just a cab away. The convenience and the scrumptious food resulted in the unwanted 5 lbs on my already hanging belly. But it was all worth it!

Back from my personal salvation, here I am, picking my son up from preschool with my daughter in the back carseat. Turning at the corner of my street, my 20 months old daughter with limited verbal ability excitedly shouted out, "Mein Mein! " (it means noodles in Mandarin) and pointed at the All You Can Eat soup and salad place. My son then shouted, " Can we go there for dinner? Is it Monday today?"  To my son, the 4 years old nonstop-talking boy, Monday doens't mean anything but dinner at Souplantation/Sweet Tomato. Every Monday. Why? How? When did we start this routine? I don't quite remember. But my big guy and the kids love the cream of mushroom soup, the fake-cheese-tasting Mac&Cheese, and the warm blueberry muffins. So I'm relieved from dinner making every Monday.

To tell the truth, 12 years ago, I could never, ever, imagine eating at the same restaurant, or even the same food EVERY Monday. I would open my eyes wide and said, "What? Why would anyone want to do that? There are just so many other things out there to eat!". But magically, I found peace and comfort in our little routine. I know I will see my big guy talking loudly with his mouth full and my little ones laughing loudly with ice cream mustaches. The leafy veggies on my plate is grass compared to the spicy hot pot I had in Taipei. But somehow, in a weird way, I kind of look forward to chewing grass every Monday.

I guess it's not a bad thing after all, being happily domesticated.

Kindergarten Registration 註冊中

I don't know if you have seen the Target 2010 holiday commercial. It was so hilarious and made me want to rush to Target right away. Even though I'm almost there everyday already...buying essential and unnecessary household items at the same time.

As much as I can remember, the blonde lady in the commercial was wearing full body red track suit, doing sit-ups on the big red Target ball, (my 20 months old daughter still thinks it can be kicked like a regular ball...), lifting baskets of products as weights, practicing speed-giftwrap, running with a parachute behind, and counting down days on the calendar...all for the 2 days sale starting on black Friday.

As hilarious (or ridiculous) as it might sound, I did exactly all the above things in my mind, over and over again. But it was not for the great Target sale. It was for my son's kindergarten registration.

Yes, you read me right. Now you know what kind of mom I am...a teacher mom to be exact. After being an elementary teacher for 6 years in a prestigious south bay community, I decided to take one year leave to spend more time with my own little ones. Before I could even catch my breath, my husband got a job offer too good to reject. So here we are, moving from the sunny L.A. to the cloudy northern Cal. The dream of having my kids going to the same school I teach at can't seem to come true anymore.

Learning to be a full time mom is quite a lesson for me. All of a sudden, my son is turning 5 and entering kindergarten this fall. You must think when it comes to school registration, I shouldn't be sweating at all. I should have more insights than most parents. Unfortunately, that's why I am sweating. Because I know how tideous the paper work can be. I know how unclear the deadlines are listed. I know the possibility of one little thing goes undone, my son might not be in the lottery drawing in time.

Yes, you read me right again, lottery drawing, for a kindergarten spot in a public school setting. It's not happening at every elementary school site though, only at the "good" ones. (Oh, next time I'll talk about how "good" a school can be by just looking at its API scores...) Siblings of current students get priority to enroll in kindergarten first. Then the rest available spots are for first-born kids, which means new students to the district. However, at a "good" school, there are always way more new enrollments than the spots provided. Parents buy the unreasonable high-priced house in hope to get their kids into the good neighborhood school. But the truth is, after you have done the registration right, if your childn't name isn't picked at the lottery drawing, he or she will still be overflown to a school which still have spots available. (a.k.a, a "bad" neighborhood where parents won't fight to live in).

Now, can you understand my whole mental process of the Target preparation? I got the kindergarten registration packet in time, filled out all the forms, got the oral assessment form signed by a licensed dentist, dug out all legal documents proving residency, then booked the first appointment at 8 am to turn in the whole packet. The night before the registration appointment, I had my husband double checked all forms, told my children that Daddy will give them breakfast next morning, and went to bed thinking everything was fine and ready.

Finally, the big time had arrived. Within one minute of flipping through my son's kindergarten registration packet, the lady holding a grande cup of Starbucks coffee said to me, "I'm sorry, I can't take your registration packet today." I kept my smile but raised my voice a bit, "Excuse me, what do you mean?" "Here, you are missing an utility bill, without the bill, I can't take your packet today." "But I brought my car insurance bill. On the information sheet, it indicates that the car insurance bill is one of the documents which can prove my current location of residency."

After checking with three other ladies for 10 minutes and reading the information sheet for another minute, the lady returned to the table and said, "Oh ok,  it must be new this year. You are done. Good luck. Hopefully we'll get to see you again in fall."

There it was. My son's kindergarten registration was done. It felt like I had shopped until I dropped at Target's black Friday sale. Everything on my list was in my basket already. And I didn't even need to pepper-spray anybody!

The result is out of my hands now. All we need is a little good luck. I can't help but worry - what if they lose the 3 by 5 index card with my son's name on it? He won't even be in the lottery drawing!!!